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🌕 This Saturday 1/26/19 at 6pm, I’m teaching my monthly #kundalini #yoga & #meditation class at @leftcoastpoweryoga (uptown location) 🌕 Kundalini Yoga as taught by Yogi Bhajan is the yoga of awareness. Through pranayama, kriya, and meditation, we explore the realm of experience is build more capacity for neutralizing the mind and living healthy, and experiencing our finite selves merge with the Infinite. 🌕 Class is open to all experiences with yoga including beginners. Please wear all white (if possible) and head covering or prayer shawl. 🌕 Class is drop-in. Studio members may use monthly memberships passes or packages. 🌕 Sat Nam 🙏🏾 🌕 #kundaliniyoga #oaklandyoga #oaklandkundaliniyoga #oaklandkundalini #eastbayyoga
Going live on Instagram tomorrow for the Leo Full Moon 🌕 Eclipse. All are welcome to tune in and be part of this and experience a Kundalini Meditation. Sat Nam 🙏🏾
Going live on Instagram tomorrow for the Leo Full Moon 🌕 Eclipse. All are welcome to tune in and be part of this and experience a Kundalini Meditation. Sat Nam 🙏🏾
• Every single aspect of Psyche is sacred. What we call “mistakes” in this society are often an offering from Psyche to bring us into awareness of our authenticity. • Because the illusion of “perfection” and dual thinking “good” and “bad”/“positive” and “negative persist in this culture, many people learn that life is just about being or expressing “positivity”. This is imbalance. Only being positive is imbalance. (Note being “positive” is not the same as having gratitude practices and choosing responsibility for our actions and how to see life). • The pressure to only be “good” or “positive” gives way to “making mistakes”. This is Psyche’s way of trying to show us the vastness of ourselves and of nature. It’s her showing us that we are human and that we have parts of ourselves that are not being fully integrated or expressed. • When we learn that if we make a mistake or show something “bad” about ourselves then we will be left and isolated, the pressure increases to be “good”, as social animals - we need community and will often do whatever it takes to be in community, even if that means hiding aspects of ourselves. • But is it worth it? The hidden parts of ourselves are often our greatest treasure or they are hiding our greatest treasures. • I’ve been experimenting with sharing my ideas and thoughts on this platform as a way of reprogramming the ways I’ve learned to hide and energetically shrink. For some of us, including me, hiding was a survival mechanism. But the thing about these survival mechanisms is that sometimes if we use them after their purpose has expired, they will make us ill. The illness is also an invitation to be healthy and be present. • This weekends #Leo Full Moon Solar Eclipse is about EXPRESSION and the courage to fully express - tears, JOY, fear, ANGER-whatever is pulsing through your consciousness . • • Join me on IG Live on Sunday 1/20 at 9am PT for a Kundalini Meditation to experience ourselves and our treasures 🙏🏾
• Every single aspect of Psyche is sacred. What we call “mistakes” in this society are often an offering from Psyche to bring us into awareness of our authenticity. • Because the illusion of “perfection” and dual thinking “good” and “bad”/“positive” and “negative persist in this culture, many people learn that life is just about being or expressing “positivity”. This is imbalance. Only being positive is imbalance. (Note being “positive” is not the same as having gratitude practices and choosing responsibility for our actions and how to see life). • The pressure to only be “good” or “positive” gives way to “making mistakes”. This is Psyche’s way of trying to show us the vastness of ourselves and of nature. It’s her showing us that we are human and that we have parts of ourselves that are not being fully integrated or expressed. • When we learn that if we make a mistake or show something “bad” about ourselves then we will be left and isolated, the pressure increases to be “good”, as social animals - we need community and will often do whatever it takes to be in community, even if that means hiding aspects of ourselves. • But is it worth it? The hidden parts of ourselves are often our greatest treasure or they are hiding our greatest treasures. • I’ve been experimenting with sharing my ideas and thoughts on this platform as a way of reprogramming the ways I’ve learned to hide and energetically shrink. For some of us, including me, hiding was a survival mechanism. But the thing about these survival mechanisms is that sometimes if we use them after their purpose has expired, they will make us ill. The illness is also an invitation to be healthy and be present. • This weekends #Leo Full Moon Solar Eclipse is about EXPRESSION and the courage to fully express - tears, JOY, fear, ANGER-whatever is pulsing through your consciousness . • • Join me on IG Live on Sunday 1/20 at 9am PT for a Kundalini Meditation to experience ourselves and our treasures 🙏🏾
• • • • “The first principle of self love is that you are not for sale.” - Yogi Bhajan • • • Who would you be if you were not for sale? Who would you be if you released the narrative that relationships are a transactional activity or that you have to compromise your Self to be around others? • I am learning to love myself. It’s not just about affirmations and saying I love myself. It is requiring shedding. I am shedding the stories I have internalized and normed around. Stories that say I’m only lovable to certain people and stories that say my worth is based on what others think about me. • • I am not for sale. I am not for sacrificing my authenticity another moment of my life. I am no longer energizing relationships or friendships that are dependent on me being a caretaker or some other kind or fantasy. I am real. I am not a fantasy. I require REALationships. The type where we cry, sing, laugh, and scream together. The types where we are always shapeshifting and prioritizing being present with what comes up in the moment over what or who we were in the past. • PURE RADICAL AUTHENTIC SELF LOVE • • Letting go, letting God. • • • Self love is loving & trusting & surrendering to God enough to let God live through me. • 📷: @salina.e.mae • #yogibhajanquotes #kundaliniyogateacher
• • • • “The first principle of self love is that you are not for sale.” - Yogi Bhajan • • • Who would you be if you were not for sale? Who would you be if you released the narrative that relationships are a transactional activity or that you have to compromise your Self to be around others? • I am learning to love myself. It’s not just about affirmations and saying I love myself. It is requiring shedding. I am shedding the stories I have internalized and normed around. Stories that say I’m only lovable to certain people and stories that say my worth is based on what others think about me. • • I am not for sale. I am not for sacrificing my authenticity another moment of my life. I am no longer energizing relationships or friendships that are dependent on me being a caretaker or some other kind or fantasy. I am real. I am not a fantasy. I require REALationships. The type where we cry, sing, laugh, and scream together. The types where we are always shapeshifting and prioritizing being present with what comes up in the moment over what or who we were in the past. • PURE RADICAL AUTHENTIC SELF LOVE • • Letting go, letting God. • • • Self love is loving & trusting & surrendering to God enough to let God live through me. • 📷: @salina.e.mae • #yogibhajanquotes #kundaliniyogateacher
♾it is what it is ♾
♾it is what it is ♾
Continuing to be humbled on this path of initiation we call Life. 🌀 Life in the physical body is an initiation, an initiation into the Infinite ♾ Unknown, to the Great Mystery...to what lays beyond what our physical senses can perceive, beyond what the current education system teaches, beyond all that we see on the surface with our 2 eyes. An initiation outside of linear time. Forgetting all the stories I’ve chosen to believe about mySelf and about Life is a humbling practice. The question arises a lot these days around am I present or am I in a “story”? The “story” of Life is being fed everywhere I look - social media, the “news”, even history texts, and through people I spend time with. It is an active act to stay present. It takes energy, life force Prana. It takes full attention and awareness. Otherwise you become a recipient of stories, and an act-er of repeating the stories. 🌀 What’s on the surface is needed though, it’s for the initiation. It’s all in Divine Order. 🌀 It can be the GPS to constantly reroute us to the Truth, to our pure nature. To remember we are Infinite in a world that is invested in perpetuating the narrative of us being finite is indeed an act of resistance.
Continuing to be humbled on this path of initiation we call Life. 🌀 Life in the physical body is an initiation, an initiation into the Infinite ♾ Unknown, to the Great Mystery...to what lays beyond what our physical senses can perceive, beyond what the current education system teaches, beyond all that we see on the surface with our 2 eyes. An initiation outside of linear time. Forgetting all the stories I’ve chosen to believe about mySelf and about Life is a humbling practice. The question arises a lot these days around am I present or am I in a “story”? The “story” of Life is being fed everywhere I look - social media, the “news”, even history texts, and through people I spend time with. It is an active act to stay present. It takes energy, life force Prana. It takes full attention and awareness. Otherwise you become a recipient of stories, and an act-er of repeating the stories. 🌀 What’s on the surface is needed though, it’s for the initiation. It’s all in Divine Order. 🌀 It can be the GPS to constantly reroute us to the Truth, to our pure nature. To remember we are Infinite in a world that is invested in perpetuating the narrative of us being finite is indeed an act of resistance.
Coming home to myself...over & over again
Coming home to myself...over & over again
I am learning to embrace MYSTERY. Great Divine All Knowing All Unknowing Mystery. - Mystery is pregnant with LIFE and reality. She lives between the inhales and exhales. She lives in spontaneity and “wrong” turns on the highway. She lives in each life unit of air and each speck of soil. She is everywhere. • She lives underneath everything our mind “thinks” it knows. She laughs as she hears people use evidence to prove something as “tangible” and “known”. She wonders why we hold on to the past as a dictator of the future. But she also allows us to unconsciously keep re-creating our past. • Because as much as the “evolved” human thinks that they know, and as much as they yearn to control natural forces, Great Mystery is beyond being controlled. Even when algorithms are created to mimic Great Mystery, it is ONLY Great Mystery. • I bow humbly over and over again to not knowing and to baring witness to Life unfolding through me.
I am learning to embrace MYSTERY. Great Divine All Knowing All Unknowing Mystery. - Mystery is pregnant with LIFE and reality. She lives between the inhales and exhales. She lives in spontaneity and “wrong” turns on the highway. She lives in each life unit of air and each speck of soil. She is everywhere. • She lives underneath everything our mind “thinks” it knows. She laughs as she hears people use evidence to prove something as “tangible” and “known”. She wonders why we hold on to the past as a dictator of the future. But she also allows us to unconsciously keep re-creating our past. • Because as much as the “evolved” human thinks that they know, and as much as they yearn to control natural forces, Great Mystery is beyond being controlled. Even when algorithms are created to mimic Great Mystery, it is ONLY Great Mystery. • I bow humbly over and over again to not knowing and to baring witness to Life unfolding through me.
I need this reminder today. My mind and ego is on one today. The stories of my mind can be so seductive and familiar having me believe that I’m separate from God and forgotten in this Universe. I know it’s illusion, and sometimes I witness mind really going there. The more I witness the more I also don’t fear my mind going “there”. I welcome my mind going to the deepest darkest valleys, sometimes that is the path to the present moment. Sat Nam
I need this reminder today. My mind and ego is on one today. The stories of my mind can be so seductive and familiar having me believe that I’m separate from God and forgotten in this Universe. I know it’s illusion, and sometimes I witness mind really going there. The more I witness the more I also don’t fear my mind going “there”. I welcome my mind going to the deepest darkest valleys, sometimes that is the path to the present moment. Sat Nam
Your vibe attracts your tribe! ❤️ Happy Birthday @carmen_struthair !!! I’m so honored to share community with you ❤️❤️
Your vibe attracts your tribe! ❤️ Happy Birthday @carmen_struthair !!! I’m so honored to share community with you ❤️❤️

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Scorpio Full Moon Vibes

May 08, 2017

Scorpio Full Moon
Wednesday 5/10/17 | 2:42pm PT

Scorpio rules sex, death and taxes.  It rules all of the things we typically work (usually unconsciously) to not think about; the shadow.  Shadows are the areas in our life that we tend to be working hard to get rid of, to not show about ourselves, and/or to erase from our psyche.  It is that thing we go to therapy to fix or that body part we go on a diet because of.  The irony is that the shadow is usually apparent in some way, even though we may try to kill it...it is indestructible.  It is a part of the soul, is a part of God, and therefore can never be erased or killed.  It will take new forms, swim different paths, but its presence will always be. 

I recently started chanting the 18th pauri as a 40 day practice leading up o my 35th birthday.  This pauri spoke to me as it gives the hope to be able to dissolve the illusion between shadow and light.  Chanting this pauri has the effect of, "fights madness, deep feelings of inferiority and self-destructive behavior" (according to Yogi Bhajan). Trying to kill my shadow is self-destructive.  Whatever I do to my shadow, I do to my whole self.  This whole past year has been about reckoning with my shadow and learning to forgive myself over and over again.  In reading an article about this pauri, the author Eck Ong Kaar Kaur writes: 

The shadow forces us to face what we do not want to face, and make peace with what we do not want to acknowledge.

The beauty of Kundalini Yoga is that it brings what is unconscious into consciousness.  As I continue to dive into this pauri, it is bringing me awareness of the discomfort I have around my body.  My relationship to my body is .... dysfunctional?  It is abusive and critical.  From age 5, I learned to say disparaging comments to myself particularly about my physical appearance and body.  I learned to see myself as ugly and to see my body as abnormal and unpleasant for other people to look at.  I learned ways to manage my body; abusive words, controlled disordered eating, and covering myself up and trying to camouflage my fleshy big legs and soft belly.  

Trying to hide is exhausting.  I am still hiding at age 34, the same hiding I did at age 7.  A friend asked me tonight, "What would be the opposite of hiding?"....I responded "Letting myself be seen, not controlling what others see in me".  I feel scared writing this.  A part of myself is judging myself right now, "Shirley, this is everyone's story - you sound so basic writing about being seen!" It is true, this experience is probably very relatable to many human beings, and it is okay that I am sharing my experience.  I have wanted to kill this story and experience for years.  I have wanted to overcome it.  Today as I write though, overcoming feels like a part of the abuse cycle.  I wonder what acceptance could be like.

I think I am hiding from others, but the truth is most people probably can see all this that I am writing about.  Most people who know me probably can see or sense my insecurities, my desperate attempts to hide and my discomfort with my body.  This pauri is bringing to light that the person I am trying to hide from so often is myself.  I don't want to see me, my shadow, or my light.  I want to see fragments that I can criticize.  I am familiar with being critical toward myself.  It scares me to see my shadow, to see God and the brilliance of my psyche dancing as this shadow.

I don't know what to do from here.  I don't know what will happen.  I am not sure I will ever have a  sweet, unconditionally loving healthy relationship with my body.  I also think it is okay that I don't.  What seems most important right now is that I just make space to see myself and practice seeing myself and taking myself in.  Taking it ALL in...flaws and all.  Taking it all in, God and all.

May your full moon be full of permission to take your full self in - your shadow, your light - your stories - your relationships; taking it all in as it is now with judgement or without, but just allowing it to be so that you can see yourself, the same way you see the full moon; as magical, powerful, and whole.

 

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